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一伙劫匪在抢劫银行时说了一句至理名言： “通通不许动，钱是国家的，命是自己的！”大家都一声不吭躺倒。——这叫观念转化，改变原有固定思维方式。 : X: }2 C! w# r3 f
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3 j- Q; O( L/ e- g0 u# L5 }! a劫匪望了一眼穿着裙子躺在桌上呈大字形的出纳小姐，说：“请你躺文明些！这是劫财，又不是劫色！”——这叫坚持职业操守，不该干的不干！
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: c; T: Y j1 z* C抢劫成功回去后，其中一个新来的劫匪（硕士学历）说，“老大，我们赶快数一下抢了多少”7 y0 f, b4 N+ a& s4 i! y
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, w9 m, q% ~* K0 E) X那老劫匪（小学学历）说：“你傻啊？这么多钱，你要数到什么时候啊？今天晚上看新闻不就知道了吗。” ——这就叫工作经验，这年头工作经验比学历更重要!
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+ a0 m9 Q* R' Y, H3 |9 x8 L劫匪走后，行长说，赶紧报案！主任刚要走，行长急忙说：“ 等等！把我们上次私自挪用的那五百万也加上去！”——这叫危机预案，化不利为有利！
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* d# _) k* s: G" o* @主任说：“要是劫匪每个月都来抢一回就好了”。—— 工作很枯燥，快乐最重要！
/ N9 M* T7 f! j第二天新闻联播报道银行被抢了一亿，可劫匪数来数去只有两千万。
1 I- y8 e# U$ y6 F# V9 U9 |老大骂道：“妈的，老子拼了一条命才抢了两千万，银行行长动动手指头就赚了八千万，看来这年头还是要读书啊！”——知识可以转化金钱的明证！2 T r9 h& M) w, E# j) ?
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% I3 ?- Y" H# `% j+ _6 a( S银行行长看到新闻联播后激动滴对主任说：“妈的，你小子可以，胆儿够肥的啊……”. ]! f3 r0 m! G0 w
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