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1.赌城边上的一个生意人在街上碰到一个衣着不齐的流浪汉一样的人。 那人向生意人诉苦道：“先生，您能施舍我50块钱吗？我已经有两天两夜没有吃饭了。” 生意人瞥了一眼四周密密麻麻排列着的DC，怀疑地问道：“我怎么知道你不会拿这钱去赌？” 那人急忙辩道：“不会的！赌的钱我已经要到了！”5 i/ b Q. c* w4 R" s
1 f1 @' F: N3 ?' I2.有一个赌棍，每次DB都会带自己的女友去，而且每次都会赢!有一天女友终于按捺不住了，问男友：“你怎么每次赌都带我去，是不是想用我的美色勾引他们?”6 ~6 F5 L+ W M5 y
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男友不屑地回答道：“你想哪儿去了，我带你去是吓他们的!”& F, J+ O' P1 }" }/ j
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3.老公爱打MJ，有天上小学的女儿对他说：老湿说打麻将是Dubo，会被JC抓走的。, R; ]; o+ @( o7 Z% x
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老公：怕啥呀，万一我被判刑了，你可以给老爸送饭啊。
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3 b* a1 r6 ^, e" R4 I9 {女儿同情地说：万一判死刑呢。。。/ n. k) W4 \! L- U& |) n$ p
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笑死我了。。。, [' z1 x) h5 G5 L
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4.我的一个小外甥女，有一次接她放学回家，) a( L% d, L, F
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可能是饿了，一回家就要吃饭，
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我就想逗逗她:小妞妞，想吃饭要背三字经给舅舅听哦，不然没饭吃哦!$ p/ W1 `% K: Z! Y5 B) F
; V' B$ \( T* s6 f她一听急了张口就来:人之初，性本善，要读书，先吃饭!
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晚上，孩子趴在桌子上写日记：“夜深了，妈妈仍在打MJ，爸爸仍在上网……”7 e2 ?: v! N+ f4 B- G* a+ ^& n
8 Y% p5 ?5 |3 K( _2 Y' U, t恰巧爸爸走了过来，看到孩子写的这句话，有点不高兴，
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就教育孩子说：“日记不能照搬生活，要源于生活，高于生活!”
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孩子听了，马上修改为：“夜深了，妈妈仍在DB，爸爸仍在网恋…
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1 m$ `5 [' w+ q `# o+ D1 k% s/ o5.两天输掉十多万了，我一天的固定收入才四千，
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. I& s) `2 w) R; u我不能再沉迷于DB了，该找个姑娘过正常人的生活了！' i5 X: r L* X& R2 u6 j. g& S
7 n) X1 y/ a- W5 B: E$ }一女看我留言后:你若能改，我愿意做你女朋友。; x7 A. W7 X! c3 E3 u( i
' a% j3 R- M6 i- e9 \当晚我俩见面开房，睡后，躺床上女问我：你是做什么生意的？
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我，无业闲人一个。! T* @. h+ Z+ Y; }
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女:扯淡，那怎么每天收入四千？
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: V3 H( C" b' i, h$ c' I% N/ y我说的是欢乐豆，一天就能领四千豆。
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女：滚她妈犊子，滚…
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当前离线
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