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1.赌城边上的一个生意人在街上碰到一个衣着不齐的流浪汉一样的人。 那人向生意人诉苦道：“先生，您能施舍我50块钱吗？我已经有两天两夜没有吃饭了。” 生意人瞥了一眼四周密密麻麻排列着的DC，怀疑地问道：“我怎么知道你不会拿这钱去赌？” 那人急忙辩道：“不会的！赌的钱我已经要到了！”5 ~* z" {" ~4 g9 b2 e0 [8 C- G
1 d$ ~: Y3 }! l) B9 w2.有一个赌棍，每次DB都会带自己的女友去，而且每次都会赢!有一天女友终于按捺不住了，问男友：“你怎么每次赌都带我去，是不是想用我的美色勾引他们?”
6 q I; [6 K# k; _/ |2 W |- _8 c: O
& C/ m) H6 Q1 r5 h2 t/ T男友不屑地回答道：“你想哪儿去了，我带你去是吓他们的!”$ \2 S6 U: h4 k( x9 s; |( [
" e% I/ s. w7 U4 J3.老公爱打MJ，有天上小学的女儿对他说：老湿说打麻将是Dubo，会被JC抓走的。
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老公：怕啥呀，万一我被判刑了，你可以给老爸送饭啊。
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女儿同情地说：万一判死刑呢。。。, ^2 D, a5 D' F) J7 Z
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笑死我了。。。
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. J# a3 z( V, W: H4 x& D' q/ U4.我的一个小外甥女，有一次接她放学回家，
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可能是饿了，一回家就要吃饭，$ P( H4 s3 O9 u% W8 O
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我就想逗逗她:小妞妞，想吃饭要背三字经给舅舅听哦，不然没饭吃哦!
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* |5 B- m0 r! K N* L* g( w她一听急了张口就来:人之初，性本善，要读书，先吃饭!5 i6 o& h" e' A' q1 T
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晚上，孩子趴在桌子上写日记：“夜深了，妈妈仍在打MJ，爸爸仍在上网……”
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恰巧爸爸走了过来，看到孩子写的这句话，有点不高兴，; w6 i% R0 k U+ j- w
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就教育孩子说：“日记不能照搬生活，要源于生活，高于生活!”" d1 j$ C5 O2 K3 V- n
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孩子听了，马上修改为：“夜深了，妈妈仍在DB，爸爸仍在网恋…, [8 @! w( p4 O8 e! e4 O
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5.两天输掉十多万了，我一天的固定收入才四千，; l! M) P6 B% ?3 ^# M5 n: k
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我不能再沉迷于DB了，该找个姑娘过正常人的生活了！
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# i* E# z9 _0 m/ D, ^一女看我留言后:你若能改，我愿意做你女朋友。
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: g7 G8 {1 @# A, K$ _# U2 S当晚我俩见面开房，睡后，躺床上女问我：你是做什么生意的？$ [# c* u( ?) }5 D3 ^# s
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我，无业闲人一个。
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女:扯淡，那怎么每天收入四千？6 x+ u# N& R& V. n
0 D" X6 m$ O5 @3 {" y/ k$ ~我说的是欢乐豆，一天就能领四千豆。: G3 W" |, P; H9 F. p, J& {
i% H5 l9 k& {$ H4 g女：滚她妈犊子，滚…% B' L, N7 b- Z$ `
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当前离线
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